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September 30, 2004
In the Mind; Up a Tree; On the Web
Old friend Bradly has a sweet new bit up at his flash site. An animation through his mind's eye.
Check it out: Direct link or round about via the middle spider in the animation section. (large file flash movie; you'll need broadband)
Posted by Nick at 05:02 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 29, 2004
Step into the Green Zone of a Never Revolving Planet
Wonderful NYT essay about the (slim) possibilty of a narrow band of life-sustaining conditions existing on a small(ish) planet found recently orbiting a red dwarf star only about 50 lightyears away.
All of a Sudden, the Neighborhood Looks a Lot Friendlier (two pages)
Gliese 436 b, bathed in permanent twilight.
Posted by Nick at 08:38 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
The Sweet Chime of 36.01 Terraflops
I.B.M. has put America back on the top of supercomputing race, beating Japan's Earth Simulator which had been holding the record for a few years now with (a paltry) 35.86 trillion calculations per second. How yesterday!
I.B.M. Supercomputer Sets World Record for Speed (1 page)
USA! USA!
Now if only we could win back the America's Cup.
Posted by Nick at 08:27 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
September 27, 2004
A Discourse in the State of Prose
No wonder why I read maudnewton.com so often. Today Maud details out some of her novel struggles with style. Struggles I know well myself. But let's get right to the blockquotes:
To use abstraction in a story, to directly explore a character’s feelings or psychology, is to violate an unspoken rule that contemporary fiction should be as much like a screenplay as possible. Storytelling increasingly is influenced by film. The physicality of characters, rather than their emotional states, is paramount. And to probe a character’s inner life in any but the most detached, ironic way, is to engage in a quaint, outmoded, Nineteenth Century custom. It’s the literary equivalent of using a shaving mug.
No wonder I feel so alone (and with a beard no less)!!
Undoubtedly there are reasons to disfavor abstractions. When they appear, too often they clutter the prose, popping up so often, and without reference to physical detail, that they become contentless. What’s more, psychological fiction easily shades into melodrama.
Yeah, it's a constant fucking struggle. That's why it takes me six months and sixty hours just to complete a few pages of short story (and they STILL don't turn out quite right!).
Anyway, read the whole post wherein Maud is actually considering leaving her bare-bones roots behind her, even if that conclusion, is as yet, wholly unmade or at least unstated.
Then read the email I wrote to Maud right after I read that post. It's in the extended entry below:
Date: Mon, 27 Sep 2004 19:51:57 -0700 (PDT)
From: "Nicholas Kerkhoff"
To: maud@miamistories.com
Ah Maud, the post of today, of your novel, quite extemporaneously
wonderful. I was really stoked to read it. (If you don't remember me,
a beggar for a link, you consolingly linked to me once: hopit.net).
Anyway, some quite good bits there. Reading about your (previous?)
devotion to stark structure, I can understand why you may not
appreciate my own writing. But I want to convince you of the validity
of my method.
I have long ago delved into that different school, an unpopular,
perhaps old (like a shaving mug), school of descriptive, internalized
ecstatic, adjective-excessive, first-person prose, which you can see,
is not unlike my email writing.
As you say, and I plaintively agree, filmmaking has quite influenced
storytelling, and that's a problem. Why write a novel that is merely
a treatment for a future screenplay? Prose can get inside the head of
a protagonist in a way that a film never can, if the writer lets it,
so why do authors write plot-centic descriptive books as if in
competition with the excitement of a film? They'll almost always
lose.
See, Kerouac is the Graham Greene for me. Long sentences, deep-truth
descriptions, bare and unprotected, expressionistic realism. And
since I'm not a part of the established status quo, I just trundle on
in my idiosyncratic quest, while feeling pretty alone at it.
Yet since I've put up some of my work online recently I have found a
chunk of audience. The first piece with the sci-fi crowd, that's at
little easier, but my second with the Live Journal emo crowd that
populate the vast, heart-spilling, online diaries. There's a lot of
poetry out there, heartfelt, but quite often undisciplined. They feel
things very deeply, as do I. (As maybe we all do? Whether we wear it
on our sleeves or not.)
Though yes, there is that ever-present problem of melodrama, which I
quite often fight (and the main story currently up on my site, is not
a good example of winning that fight) but I fight the cliche even
more. And so, even inside of the drama, I would hope you can see what
I'm try for, (prose-wise particularly).
Like any of us strugglers, my text is far from perfect. But I am
making an attempt in a direction that may be (what I'd like to
believe is) post postmodern. Irony accepted (as a background,
undeniable) yet wrapped in a coat of personal, ambitious and not so
selfconcious prose.
So the point here is: someone out there is trying something
different, yes, purposefully and practically, with a lot of hard work
and a compass directed askew, off against the current climate.
Though you probably at this point just think I'm some kind of
untalented, over-excited and presumptuous nut.
Nick
PS-I'm probably going to post this letter up on my weblog, so I don't
have to write it out twice in two different ways.
Posted by Nick at 11:17 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
September 26, 2004
Painful Glories of the Information Age
I ran across a blog the other day called sixthseal.com.
It's written by an extremely prolific blogger in Malasia. He's a computer engineer and a methamphetamine addict.
Or actually he was a meth addict. (Plus dabbling in an amazing pharmacopeia of other drugs, which he lists.)
I had been reading his archives where he details out quite directly his habit (with tons of photos of him shooting up and smoking crystal meth).
Then I read his about page. It turns out he has just recently quit (mostly).
And my first reaction was like aw, that sucks, I got here too late.
Then I did a double take. What a terrible thing to think! What a nasty world of entertainment when some lonely geek kid is detailing out his gnarly drug habit for the world and I'm bummed that he's quiting, because it won't be as interesting.
That is some disgusting mix of reality-tv overload, a gigantic impersonal world-wide data network, and the fleeting thrills of momentary titillation that has come to very well desensitized me.
...
Posted by Nick at 12:06 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 25, 2004
Nearly Good as Gondry
Another music video director of precise talent, I came across the website of mark romanek.
Posted by Nick at 10:15 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Photosynthesis + Photovoltaics = Smart
MIT Works to Power Computers With Spinach (1 page)
Posted by Nick at 11:18 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 24, 2004
And Then More Good News
From my home state:
California OKs World's Toughest Smog Rules (2 page)
Posted by Nick at 09:24 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Blogging vs. Writing
Maud put up a post the other day about famous authors and their blogs, and the (frequent) personal and blogged debate about whether doing a weblog takes away from other valuable writing time.
For me the answer is probably yes, but I haven't been a very disciplined writer for the last probably six months anyway. (So it's convient (and a little reassuring) to blame something you're "wasting" time on, when you'd probably be wasting that time anyway; so I should also blame surfing).
Though Cory doesn't seem to have a problem. Very prolific, that guy. (Maybe he's one of the few people who actually uses technology to make themselves more efficient, instead of the opposite).
I also tend to prefer blogs that are link-oriented, instead of journal-oriented. I do spend a lot of time on the internet, so putting up posts about interesting stuff I run across is not too much of a hassle.
I have written the occasional essay post and personal post and that definitely can drain my writing resource for the day. (Which means those will be rare).
Overall, it's an irony: I started this website to get more people to read my work, yet running it does take time away from doing more work.
Silly life and its contradictions!
Posted by Nick at 12:39 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 22, 2004
Surfing With One Arm
You've probably heard about Bethany Hamilton, the young surfer girl who lost her left arm in a shark attack.
Well here's some amazing video of her surfing, one-armed, in competition!
QuickTime, or WindowsMedia. (her bit comes on in about the second quarter of the vid)
Posted by Nick at 02:08 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 20, 2004
Pro Shortboarding
Joel Parkinson:
beat Kelly Slater:
at trestles today:
Which Ry and I watched streaming online, as part of the ASP world tour
Posted by Nick at 11:51 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Bit of a Mental Challenge
I love these types of games. Make ya tink.
Play the Petals Around the Rose game. (via boingboing)
Might want to mute your sound though, the site has terrible background musak.
Posted by Nick at 11:03 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Highly Doubtful, But Cool
Posted by Nick at 10:33 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
September 19, 2004
Wonderfully Ecstatic Evolutionist
Great excerpt at the Guardian from Richard Dawkins' new book called The Ancestor's Tale, counting the few brillaint evolutionary survival mechanisms that seem to appear only once in biology.
McGavin's next candidate for an evolutionary one-off is a beauty. It is the diving bell spider, Argyroneta aquatica. This spider lives and hunts entirely under water but, like dolphins, dugongs, turtles, freshwater snails and other land animals that have returned to water, it needs to breathe air. Unlike all those other exiles, Argyroneta constructs its own diving bell. It spins it of silk (silk is the universal solution to any spider problem) attached to an underwater plant.
It is wonderfully written and some great passages that I just can't help but quote:
The universe could so easily have remained lifeless and simple - just physics and chemistry, the scattered dust of the cosmic explosion that gave birth to time and space. The fact that life evolved out of nearly nothing, some 10 billion years after the universe evolved out of literally nothing, is a fact so staggering that I would be mad to attempt words to do it justice. Even that is not the end of the matter. Not only did evolution happen: it eventually led to beings capable of comprehending the process, and even of comprehending the process by which they comprehend it.
The only thing not addressed (though this only an extract, it's probably in the book) is why sentient intelligence seems to be a one-off.
Posted by Nick at 08:23 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 18, 2004
The Best Spam I've Recieved in Some Time
This one made it into my inbox, but I don't think I'm the intended audience.
I like the fall persimmons in the top corner though. (.gif)
Posted by Nick at 05:45 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 16, 2004
Mars Exploration '05 to '09
Upcoming Mars missions, in preparation for humans, hopefully 20 or 30 years hence.
Posted by Nick at 08:05 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 15, 2004
Best Urinals From Around the World
Brad and I used to often debate the merits of differing urinal designs at bars and restaurants and such. Ease of use, lack of splatter, that sort of thing.
So this being the internet and all, there is of course Unrinal.net, a site devoted to photographs of urinals around the world.
Check out their top ten. My fav is the The Felix in Hong Kong. Very hip.
Posted by Nick at 06:06 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 14, 2004
Livejournal Script Displays Last 30 Pictures Posted
This can be pretty entertaining and addictive.
Just keep hitting refresh (F5).
(via Attu sees all)
Posted by Nick at 09:42 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Sally Mann Photographs
This must be the most world-weary picture of a little girl ever.
Also check this one. Really astounding.
The rest of this site shows off her amazing ability to get naked kids to look very serious.
I remember seeing a Charlie Rose interview with her about a year ago where she said she started out as writer but gave it up as being too hard.
-Maybe I should buy a camera.
Posted by Nick at 09:14 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Tripping on Shamanistic Drugs in the Amazon
I've done shrooms on the beach in Oregon. Not quite the same as this:
The New York Times - Travel - The Vision Seekers (three pages (via Maud))
Posted by Nick at 01:21 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 13, 2004
Torturing Flowers for Auditory Pleasure
Yahoo! News - Japan Gadget Turns Plants Into Speakers (one page)
Posted by Nick at 02:40 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 12, 2004
New Story Up
Rather different than the first.
Can't read it with a calloused eye. In fact, get stoned to read it!
This is my emo-rock of stories, so maybe put on a little Death Cab For Cutie (though I was listening to Cat Power when I wrote it) pop open your sincerity gland and let 'er rip.
Posted by Nick at 01:00 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 11, 2004
Girl Writes Touching Letter To Her Blog - Her Blog Responds Callously, then Sadly
Cup of Chicha: Wherein the News is Broken Gently
Posted by Nick at 10:14 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 10, 2004
Being in the Wave
Got inside my first barrel yesterday. It looked something like this:
Only, replace the mountains with a ten story condo and dirty up the water a little.
It was wonderful. (Though also painful, as I did not make it out).
Posted by Nick at 11:19 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 09, 2004
Weird Saudi Arabia PR Site
I clicked on an ad in the New York Time's site, with the bold message "What did the 9-11 Commission Say About Saudi Arabia" and it took me to this explanation page on a what appears to be a Saudi-funded public relations site called AboutSaudiArabia.net explaining all about how they're working so very hard against the war on terror.
Bizarrely, in order to get more information you have to register with them.
Posted by Nick at 06:27 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 08, 2004
Stench-bot Consumes Bugs for Juice (my best title ever!)
Yahoo! News - Smelly Robot Eats Flies to Generate Its Own Power (half page)
Posted by Nick at 03:41 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 06, 2004
Art and the art of Self-indulgence
Watched the movie CQ last night, then read this recent Vincent Gallo interview this morning.
The combination has been fluidly mixing together in my brain. Not quite like oil and vinegar, but more like two different types of oil (let's say soybean and canola).
CQ is a movie about making movies, automatically making it self-reflexive. But the main character is making two movies: one comercial and one personal. In the personal one, he sits in his underwear in his bathroom with a film camera pointed at himself talking about his life and his struggles in making sincere art. AHHHH! (The comercial one is a 60s-style cheesy Barbarella sci-fi flick).
Not only that, but it's directed by extreme nepotism recipient, the easily-resentable, Roman Coppola, son of the wealthy Francis Ford.
Now the problem here is that I too sit in my underwear, though not in a bathroom with a camera, but in this room here with my laptop, detailing out the ways in which I struggle with producing anything worth while as well. (Like right now).
There are common words for this: narcissism, pretension, self-indulgence.
This prompted me last night to scoured one of my particularly bare, fragile, and personal stories and to gouge out any possible bits of conceit. Yet the conceit was in the simple making of it. In the presumption that it is worth anyone's time, even my own. Rather, I should probably be out doing charity work.
Then this morning I read the Gallo piece, because he's always pretty entertaining in an interview, spilling out all his Gallo-centric rantings.
And I was struck by what seemed like a honest facet of him: the self-protecting vulnerable artist who wants to just make art he finds worthwhile. None of the normal quests for publicity and fame and look-at-me junk that usually seems always associated with him.
And the defense of self-important art: to make a singular vision that no one else can make, because you are a unique individual. That seems worthy.
As I was saying in my long Maud post the other day, I think every artist has to struggle with the personal depths of honest expression, while trying to stay outside of one's pitiable tendancies.
This is a fulcrum on which my balance is ridiculously precarious.
Posted by Nick at 01:08 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 05, 2004
Mountainbiking with Bears
Very exciting story:
Yahoo! News - Cyclist Attacked by Grizzly Bear in Wyo. (page and a half)
(Unrelated Bonus Not Worth It's Own Post: Read the caption of this picture closely)
Posted by Nick at 09:52 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Cash Instead of Concert Tickets
Humorous article on the lost art of palming a few bills to bribe the doorman.
The New York Times - Allow Me to Introduce My Friend, Andrew Jackson (3 pager)
Posted by Nick at 06:45 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
The Anti-Bush Video Game
Hulk Hogan, Mr. T (with cancer), and (a very fat) He-Man set out to stop the Bush admininstration's evil policies. (flash game)
Would I be kidding? Nope. This is in the internet, remember?
(And if you know anything about Emo, play their orignal emo games).
All kinds of aliased graphical fun.
Posted by Nick at 05:32 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Sequel To Pulp Fiction??
No, but possibly a PREquel. (Those are all the rage these days.)
Yahoo! News - 'Pulp Fiction' Prequel Considered (half page)
Posted by Nick at 11:31 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 04, 2004
Obsession for the 21st Century
Ah, the future.
Yahoo! News - Calif. Man Accused of Stalking Via GPS (half page)
Posted by Nick at 07:20 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
Lit Philosophy via Maud (dissection and comment)
Maud Newton's is a literary weblog. It's quite good.
It makes me wonder if I'm using the above apostrophes correct(ly).
Of late she has had a number of particularly conclusive posts about the nature of writing and the writerly world.
There's always that, in between the book reviews, the personal bits, politics, and famous writer gossip (making it all a tasty intellectual stew) but recently a few screeds and manifestos together collected, apparently without thematic forethought, got my noggin a'thinkin'.
So my thoughts are collected in the "Continue Reading" section below.
Starting with the older first, there were these two "guest opinions" (a new feature for Maud): (1,2) commenting on nearly the same thing: good ol'snark. A debate which I've covered a bit before. The Sean Carman essay is just a drawn out dismissal of Dale Peck. But the Emma Garman essay is a better written, more precise bit, oppositely endorsing critical reviews. And she takes into account the most interesting thing I found in the Julavits' rambling but refreshing Believer essay, that is, the defense of ambitious writing.
As will be evident in the next story I'm going to post (soon, soon) my ambition quite often hits the limits of my abilities. Yet I try to press on with the high ideals, thinking at least people might see what I was going for, even if I didn't quite reach it. Aiming high and missing always seems better than aiming low or to the middle. Yet the most frightening thing in contemporary literature, is the protectionistic tendency of the smart trying to stay smart. Since lit has been dubbed the art of the intellectual set, it is too easy for writers, like academics, to hide behind the facade of Unquestionable Intelligence. Leaving their true staggering, scared, honest selves, covered up by copious layers of brain.
But shit, it's really damn frightening to let true vulnerability show (ask Salinger, Cobain, and Van Gogh). Then one must contend with a harsh public review?
Yet if we need to be critical to keep lit on its toes, how do we stop an atmosphere of critical pretension from building up thick and guarded like the Berlin wall?
I don't know the answer.
But moving on.. I've got more to cover... and I need to try to keep this as succinct as possible.
Next we've got Graham Greene quoted as suggesting that books can only deeply move us when we're young. So here's the exact problem! Caught behind a wall of age, comfort, patterns and intellectual abstraction, how can anyone really truly appreciate anything deeply and spiritually. For like he says, maybe we get to a point where we can only admire and be entertained. Well sure, if you've stopped growing as a person. So my suggestion to Mr. Greene would have been: locate some good strong weed and smoke it hard until life becomes amazing again.
Then wonderfully, Maud relates a personal anecdote about how she would solve jigsaw puzzle pieces under the couch so that "nobody could see me making a mistake; nobody could watch me thinking." I think that is so great! And it is just The Perfect Metaphor for the tragic preoccupations of the reinforced smart mind. Her post spells it out: the basic assumption of success, the need for tight control, the self-deprecating defense. And yet behind it there is a little girl under a couch just wanting to solve a puzzle. Beautiful.
Next comes the brutal but quite funny satire of the young writer's mind. This kind of stuff always kills me. Even though I don't match plenty of it, just one bit need work, and the insinuation that I'm a cliche stops the creative process cold. Yet it is actually quite telling of the mindset of the wanna-be writer. It pegs well the solipsism and narcissism that any artist struggles with. You're displaying yourself, but you must not be pre-occupied with yourself. It's a brutal conundrum.
Now we're onto a post about the hip McSweeney’s crowd. The dominators of young cool writing. The popular clique you love to hate, hate to love, or wish you were a part of. I've got no big beef with them, except maybe that I think their hype exceeds their output. Mystique is what attracts most people, and that's not a surprise. Image is everything.
Next, a bit about MFA's. And it seems to me that it's like the same reason for not going to film school: take that money and just go make some films.
Just be a writer. Use the money to not have a day job. Motivation is an internal problem, don't pay other people to provide it for you.
OKAY, LAST ONE.
Tom Robbins' excerpted spiel about writing. He's got it right when he invokes the "the rapture of being alive". (Tell Graham Greene). Playfulness, as he refers to it, is a kid trait. Yet no intellectual lauded adult wants to be seen as a kid. Kids make mistakes, get things wrong, and think up impossible silly ideas. This protection just stunts the expression of the honest flawed child we all basically still are.
He gets it wrong though when he suggest that this playfulness is the opposite of the "gravity and misfortune" that so many contemporary writers (he feels) are obsessed with. He equates darkness and despair with self-pity and self-indulgence. Totally incorrect. (That's like saying all optimists blindly deny the true harsh nature of the brutal world).
Like I was trying to say earlier, the artist must try to invoke his deepest self and that is surely a very egotistical act. Framing it in the right perspective and using it correctly is the key.
Though again he is right when he invokes the idea that many writers hide behind dark, harsh material. In the same way that anger makes everything feel legitimate (e.g. punk music), it can be a simple path to apparent, yet shallow, emotional honesty.
Alright, I getting tired. So if anyone actually read all this and wants to discuss any of it, you could start leaving comments below. Or email me. But I'm tired of writing. And this is only a blog post.
(note: upon rereading this i had to edit and correct some things. but that's what i get from hasty late-night riffing)
Posted by Nick at 12:01 AM | Comments (7) | TrackBack
September 03, 2004
Leave it To Krugman To Succinctly Spell Out Republican Angst
Since I've been in the Star Wars mood, let me first quote Yoda:
"Fear is the path to the Dark Side. Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering."
Gosh, is this the new GOP agenda?
The New York Times - Op-Ed Columnist: Feel the Hate (one page)
Almost as good as what The Boss has to say. (I linked to this earlier, but now the NYT wants you to pay for it, so that's link to someone who ripped it off and reposted it).
Posted by Nick at 06:31 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 02, 2004
E.T. Contact - It's Nearly Ridiculous To Get One's Hopes Up, But....
SETI@Home has found something.
Yahoo! News - Could Space Signal Be Alien Contact? (one page)
(Update: There's a longer and more detailed article about this over at New Scientist).
(Update 2: BBC news article dismissing signal hype as false (via boingboing))
(Update 3: The actual SETI@Home site now has their own report up about this, which is rather middle of the road between the first two)
Posted by Nick at 10:10 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack
September 01, 2004
My Uncompleted Star Wars Fan Film Script; True Geekatude Finally Revealed
First a tangent: The ocean has been great for the last few days, distracting me. Waves. Long sessions and long rides. Did a double surf today; got out when the lightning started, got back in when it finished. Also saw a few movies recently. Collateral and Hero. Demonstrating each, the amazing possibilities of both video and celluloid.
Bringing me quickly to the raison d'etre of this post. For as it occured to me, while thinking of supplimental things I could put up here, in between stories, and not having scoured the internet for anything particularly great of late, I remembered that I had written a short script for a Star Wars fan film once, and that seemed like just the perfect thing to put out on the net.
I write a lot of random crap, but I had always remembered the basic nerdy joy of writing my own Star Wars film adaption, and maybe because of that joy, I remembered it actually turning out rather well and my friends getting a kick out of it.
There was, a few years ago, a mini-rage for no-budget, backyard, weekend-produced geek tribute films. Most of which were sadly terrible (bad acting, writing, and poorly shot), but not through any lack of sincerity and effort on the filmmakers' part. (Generally collected here). They were what they were. Hobby films.
But one particularly impressed me: Duality. If you haven't seen it, take a look. Not much dialogue but wonderfully rendered. Honestly professional looking and just total kick-ass fun (if you like Star Wars).
So I thought to myself: hey, I have geeky friends, and they have no lives, so we could totally do this!!
Then I wrote a screenplay, never fully completed it, and here it is.
Looking back on it now (over three years later), I can see its flaws pretty easily. It was one of my first attempts at a play of any sort and I didn't even bother with finding out the standard screenplay format. Yet it has its own quirky appeal being in the form it is.
To put it out here, I didn't really edit it much, I merely touched up of a few bits. (Which leaves it rather rough, and a little embarrassing, but you know, whatever).
So theoretically, if anyone actually likes it and wants to turn it into an true Star Wars fan film... hey, I'd be stoked to work on it!
Posted by Nick at 09:57 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack